Josh Aterovis is the author of the Killian Kendall Mystery Series as well as numerous columns and articles. Visit his site at http://www.steliko.com/bleedinghearts

Sappy Days Are Here Again
By Josh Aterovis

November 19, 2004

Once a year, I allow myself one column filled to overflowing with sap. I unapologetically churn out a sickening sweet article listing the things for which I am thankful. My good friend Dana affectionately calls these "fluffy articles"—and they are her favorite. She's been mourning the dearth of fluffy pieces lately, so Dane...this fluff's for you!

Actually, Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays. I believe pausing to be grateful for the blessings in our lives is an extremely important element in a happy, balanced life. In an ideal world this attitude of gratitude would be a daily event, but unfortunately, we Americans tend to get caught up in the rat race, in "Important Things That Must Be Done Now," and forget to be thankful. This year more than most, I think it is vital that we stop and count our blessings. We've had a lot of setbacks, and many are still struggling with depression over recent events. The holiday season brings its own set of challenges for many people, so let's focus on the positive.

The gay rights movement made some significant strides this year. Just a few years ago, who could have predicted that same-sex marriage would actually be legal in a state in the US? Sure, it's caused an extremely volatile national debate that even influenced the presidential election, but the simple fact that it's a matter of debate is momentous. A few years ago, it would have been a laughing matter. Now everyone takes this issue seriously. We shouldn't take for granted that over 3000 couples have filed for marriage licenses in Massachusetts since the landmark ruling went into effect on May 17. And while eleven states passed anti-gay marriage amendments on November 2, even in one of the most conservative states, 25% voted against the measure. We are making progress. We can be thankful that gay marriage is a reality for some of us, and a very real possibility—dare I say likelihood?—for the rest of us.

In the entertainment world, openly gay comedienne Ellen DeGeneres had a phenomenal year. Following up on her overwhelming success with "Finding Nemo", she launched an award-winning talk show and recently announced that she would be producing and starring in a remake of the classic movie "Oh God!". A lesbian playing God—the fundamentalists must love that! We can be thankful that someone as talented as Ms. DeGeneres has found success after she came out.

After some rather cranky public outbursts, Sir Elton John got some positive press when he announced in German magazine Gala that he would like to marry his longtime partner David Furnish. "We haven't set a date, and it surely won't be a big public ceremony, but I would like to place my life in his hands with a wedding vow," John told the magazine. "David is the most important person in my life. I cannot imagine a life without him." We can be thankful that a public persona as highly respected as Elton John can talk openly about his love for his partner.

In big screen news, after many false starts, "Rent", the gay-inclusive smash hit Broadway musical, is coming to a theater near you sometime in the near future. Talks are underway to sign most of the original Broadway cast for the movie, including Taye Diggs and out-gay actor Anthony Rapp. Idena Menzel (currently wowing audiences in "Wicked"), Jesse L. Martin, and Adam Pascal are also in talks. Filming is scheduled to start in the spring, so while we'll probably have to wait longer than 525,600 minutes, we can be thankful that a story with such an important message will be made so broadly available.

On the small screen, for the first time in its six season history, there are out lesbians on Survivor—two of them, to be exact. It's not been the most interesting season for the reality show, but there's been plenty of Sapphic subtext. Several of the contestants on Bravo's Manhunt are openly gay. The only new scripted show to feature a gay character, UPN's Kevin Hill starring Taye Diggs as lawyer and single dad Kevin Hill and Patrick Breen as his gay nanny, was picked up for a full season. We can be thankful that gays and lesbians are still visible on television.

On a more personal note, I have so much to be thankful for I hardly know where to begin. First and foremost, I am thankful for my loving husband, Jon. I can't imagine life without him by my side, and I give thanks for him every day. We celebrated the first anniversary of our commitment ceremony by attending our first Broadway play. We saw "Aida" starring Deborah Cox, and I can now report that we are officially hooked. We're now salivating for the chance to see "Wicked".

I'm thankful that we were able to afford for me to work from home full-time for another year. Being able to work from home allows me to focus much more time on writing, while still painting on commission—not to mention all the dinner parties! I've turned into quite the happy little housewife, let me tell you. I joke that I'm trying to pick up the slack now that Martha is behind bars. (Come on, admit it, don't you feel safer knowing she's off the streets? —please note the sarcasm)

Speaking of being a housewife, this year will be the first time Jon and I have hosted Thanksgiving dinner at our house. His mom and brother will be joining us for turkey and all the trimmings, and I have to admit, I'm a little nervous. I'm thankful, however, that our relationship with his family is such that this is even possible. Two years ago, this wouldn't have even been an option.

I am also thankful for my friends and family who bring me such joy and offer me so much support. Back in June, we were fortunate enough to be able to go on a group vacation with seven of our closest friends. It was one of those memorable experiences that you never want to end. We enjoyed it so much, that we've decided to make it an annual event, and several friends who were unable to go this year have already cleared their schedules for next year. Then there are other friends and family members who we don't get to see as much, but they are still such an important part of our life. We are blessed to have such a tight-knit chosen family, even though we are scattered around the country now.

I am thankful to my readers and the community we have built together at my website. The message board, a feature that long sat gathering dust, is seeing more and more use these days, producing much thoughtful and intelligent discussion. The letters and email I continue to receive mean so much to me. Ask any author what they value more, money or hearing from their readers, and I can guarantee that almost all of them will quickly tell you that it's the fans that keep them writing. Not that the money isn't nice. After all, it's hard to pay the bills with a compliment, no matter how nice it is.

This year, instead of focusing on the negatives that surround us all, try counting your blessings. Go ahead. Don't be afraid to get sappy. You'll be surprised how good it feels. And just in case you don't know where to start, here's something we can all be thankful for: George W. Bush can't run for president again in 2008!

Happy Thanksgiving!